So it is FINALLY official, we are going to the Naval War College in Newport Rhode Island!! Yippee.... Here is the link, if you want to check it out. Both John and I are very excited about a year of family time, with some class work in there as well. Our door will always be open to anyone that wants to come visit!

Much love to you all
Carolyn

So as many of you know, I had a CT of my head to see if there is anything causing the headaches...

side note.. after my reaction to the medication I took for the headaches, I have only had one headache... interesting... Maybe my body is terrified I am going to take something again and fears the repercussions!! haha

back to subject...

I also had x-rays of my hands, feet, ankles, knees and hips. bilateral!! so I think they ended up taking close to 20 x-rays. Both of these appointments were Tuesday of last week... 10 days ago. I do realize most would assume no news is good news and I agree but I had to call myself to ask a random person if they had any clue about the results of these tests. There is something VERY flawed with this system... and I plan to let someone know my thoughts.

The way I see it, they could easily send a standard note.. much like my pap smear results, that the radiologist or some grunt person checks a block stating "your CT scan was negative" ... and maybe have a notation stating "your PCM will be contacting you re further tests" or more realistically "please contact your PCM if further testing is required/wanted" I really don't think this is too much for a person to ask for. Instead of having the patient, who might be freaked out waiting for results from a head CT scan, wait and wait and wait and wait... until they either call them selves or just give up waiting and forget about it.

Now, I am not the type person to go to the clinic/Dr for just any random pain or issue.. I tolerate A LOT and if it get to the point of really needing to go see someone I expect that someone to work with me, as a team, until we find the solution to the problem.

I am not happy with BACH right now and am missing private medical care or off post care. I know off post I would have this one on one care and I know I would be contacted by SOMEONE telling me of my results, asking if I want to schedule another appointment to see further into what is going on.

Now, having said that... interestingly enough, my joint pain has all but vanished.. What did I do? You ask? I got new shoes... Sketchers Shape-ups .. they are funky looking and a little odd walking in the first few times but I cannot say enough great things about these shoes. click here for more information

Anyway, I just wanted to share... and vent really.

God bless and please keep our soldiers and families in your prayers

I love you all,
Carolyn

I cannot tell you how frustrating waiting to find out our future is... It is driving me crazy!!! Not just finding out where we will be going this summer, War College (PA or RI) but also where we will live AFTER War College. We hope to know something very soon regarding the War College status but days have turned into weeks and it it just driving me crazy.. See, I am a planner and I want to start planning our move. I don't really feel that I can mentally plan a move without knowing where it is we are moving. The second issue isn't as bothersome as the first. We hope to know where we are going after the War College before we leave here but at the rate we are finding out about our first move I am not banking on having information until this time next year... at least that way I won't be frustrated if the information doesn't come when "expected"

So, I wait.. I know we are moving... (at least I assume this... we were supposed to move LAST summer so I suppose anything can happen) to either Rhode Island or Pennsylvania.. We are hoping for Rhode island.. (http://www.usnwc.edu/) if you want to check it out.. or Pennsylvania (http://www.carlisle.army.mil/) if you want to check that one out. Either one will be a great family break. John will be home more (he currently works 12-13 hours a day now with some weekend work too) and the girls will get some much needed daddy time. So will I.

This post is really just a vent for me... nothing of any real value in the information dept.

As always, I will keep you posted about what news we get, when we get it and hopefully where we are moving..

Love to you all

I would never have imagined life like today... Three years ago a creature came into my life and my life changed. Forever... and in a way that I didn't think possible.

When John and I started the process of having a family, I truthfully didn't think it would ever really happen and certainly didn't think it would change my life the way it has. Before Annabelle we had a great life. We spend our time doing what we wanted, kayaking, hiking, eating dinner out.. We were happy and I loved my life.

Then along came Annabelle.

That cold and snowy January day three years ago, everything changed. She was perfect. Her face, her head, her fingers and toes.. all perfect. I cried, John cried, Amber cried... It was the most amazing day and the best day of my life. She was all I ever dreamed of and more. As we spent our last moments with Amber, my heart filled with such love and admiration for her. What a gift she had given us. A gift that could never be repaid and one that will bond us together forever.

We headed off for our long drive home (Wichita to Clarksville) with mom along for support. Annabelle was amazing, three days old and traveled 12 hours with no problem. John and I, however were stumbling all over ourselves in fear we were doing something, everything, wrong. We spent our days watching our precious daughter grow and change... learn to crawl, sit, walk and talk. She was amazing.. Is amazing...

Never in my wildest dreams did I think being a mom, having a family would be this wonderful. That I would be this filled with love, so much so that at times I fear it will flow over...

Granted.. there are times that she tries me and pushes every button I have and some I didn't know I had... followed a moment later she announces "mommy, I love you so much!" I am not sure if she knows what she is doing but I love it non the less!

Being a parent is a funny thing.. I read the books, at times like a nut job, searched the internet for answers, called friends, parents or anyone that would listen but nothing compares to parenting yourself. There is no words for the joy children bring and the fear that goes along. At times I am not sure which is stronger, fear or love. Don't get me wrong.. I LOVE my Annabelle but the fear that goes along with that love, any love really, is overwhelming at times... you know, the fear of something happening to them, something not happening, growing up so fast, fear of someone harming her, taking her, well.... you get the point. I was not prepared for this level of emotion. Both the good but even more, the bad. So I pray, every night. That is the only thing that keeps me from spending all my time worrying about everything. Feel free to pray along with me.. (smile)

Happy birthday my dear sweet Annabelle. You are my everything and I love you more than you will ever know.

Thanks for reading.. as always.. much love to you all
Carolyn